will and testament

 It seems you've reached some sort of a strange crossroads.  All these people and experiences you thought would be with you forever is enough to make you shiver.  Just another highway marker on your way to, wherever.

Sometimes you try to burn your own life down to know what it feels like to crawl back up from the bottom.  You haven't spoken to your family in some months and you don't feel a thing.   The truth is most of those relationships were dead a long time ago.  You wonder where your former inheritance might end up, assuming there would have been any.

When my grandfather shit the bed he gave my old man a waling harpoon.  At least he seemed to have some sort of sentimental value for weird shit that didn't make sense to anyone but himself.  You can't really imagine my old man treasuring anything.  Sometimes you want to knock on the dudes dome and give him the ol' "MCFLY ANYONE HOME" but you can't.  When we'd visit gramp's house for Christmas, the dude had a pachinko machine.  If you don't know what a pachinko machine is, neither did I.  It's some sort of a Japanese gambling device which may very well have been broken, or we were too stupid to figure it out.  But damn was it fascinating. I look back at the gluttonous pile of shit under the tree and wonder what life would have been like without that material pay off.  At least it made us happy at the time, I guess.